My Eroma

This veil! It is transparent, and the beloved in plain sight. But I am blinded by what I’ve taken to be seeing. There’s a seeing that shows and a seeing that hides.

She is near and far, here and there, a yes and a no. She is my Mona Lisa. She is my Eroma.

I want her by my side. I wish time and space would vanish for a moment so we unite again.

I am so weary of this separation, weary of this face that has imprisoned the true nature of what’s recognized in our sublime encounter.

This human face is a mask, hiding the Ground from the diffracted ray of the soul.

O’ beloved! We are a whole dreaming we are apart. We are in the garden of Eden, dreaming of being fallen and thrown into time and history.

Let’s hold our roots together, let us become that garden again where the Adam and Eve in us roamed free of forms and veils. Let’s love even the snake for the sake of all sweet transgressions.

I am a pole dancer; holding on to the present, I sway in between the past and the future with legs wide open. I have spun many a year my head hurts, and that’s when I began to see things that aren’t there: a passing time and a pale heart, a play of masks, angst and differentiated existence, separations and fears.

Worst of all, I am a cheap pole dancer, spinning into the night only to emerge the next day with the stench of the late night shadows on my youthful skin. And this has lasted since eternity, or at least since the word “since” crept into our fractured souls. And this to and fro, this centrifugal fall out of the blessed present, this is my Sisyphus.

I am the cosmic person stretched across the abyss between your hell and your heaven. I am that ladder that makes a circle. In my order there is neither a descent nor an ascent. I am that infinite sphere whose center is everywhere and whose circumference is nowhere. I am the ultimate reference of all meanings, the support of all phenomena. I am that I am.

Come to me my love, my lost paradise. You are the object of all desires, and yet eternally united and even identified with the things that desire you. I know this, that our separation is only as solid as my belief in that separation.

I can’t wait to gaze at your enchanting face. My Eroma! Look into my eyes so that we annihilate each other again. The fire of our love expands faster than the frontiers of this universe. Let this fire burn all that I am, for I am apart from you only to the extent that I am.

3 thoughts on “My Eroma

  1. Noemaya, It was so healing to read your post. I recently lost a puppy beagle in an accident. I learnt a lesson from my dog lila- pure love is pure love humans or animals is irrelevant Dogs are more capable of giving unconditional love than humans

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Premaraghavan, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what it’d be like going through that. I fostered a dog a few month ago and had to let her go to adopted family, and that crushed me, let alone losing one. But as you said, I experienced pure love from her. I’ve come to realize that love is beyond all things. Even a broken heart is worth the experience.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. And this has lasted since eternity, or at least since the word “since” crept into our fractured souls.
    I know this, that our separation is only as solid as my belief in that separation.
    Extraordinary & extremely profound

    Liked by 2 people

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